The Rum Diary Review

Kemp is drinking some rum, with the villain of the moive

Now out on DVD, The Rum Diary is a rum soaked trip through Puerto Rico.  The movie starts with a hungover Paul Kemp (played fantastically by Johnny Depp) starting a new job as a writer for The San Juan Star during the 70's.  The alcoholic that Kemp is, and the availability of rum in Puerto Rico (the home of Bacardi), create a drunken baseline for the movie.  Add a extremely hot girl, Chenault (played by the unbelievably stunning Amber Heard), that Paul falls for and you have a great movie right?  Wrong, I don't know how you could make a movie about 70's Puerto Rico, a ton of rum, a hot girl, and a trip to Carnival, but they did it.  It lacks any true suspense, little action, and any substance to the rum they drink.  Without Amber Heard and Johnny Depp, this movie would be a flop.  Heard plays a very seductive fiance of a powerful American that is about to exploit the beauty of an untapped caribbean island by building a new hotel.  Depp is spectacular, as always.  I wasn't ever a big Depp fan till the last 5 years or so, but I think he does a wonderful job on pulling his inner Kief again, and really making the drunken Paul Kemp feel real and natural.  Kemp needs money, so he is going to do some "on-the-side" writing for the development company.  In the midst of this, he gets drunk, almost dies, lights a cop on fire, drinks some more, goes to Carnival, almost gets laid, and has his continence get to him.
I expected the rum to play a bigger part in the movie.  I mean it does play a big part, all the characters are drunk off of it constantly, but there is no depth to speaking of the rum.  That is the underlying theme of this movie, there is no depth.  The whole movie has you wanting more, and it never delivers.  I give this 2 out of 5 rum bottles, and that is a shame, cause I expected more out of this movie.

Live Buffett Helps Stave Off Cabin Fever

One of my Favorite JB photos

How great are the broadcasts on Radio Margaritaville of Jimmy Buffett concerts in January and February for us snow birds?  Nothing staves off the cabin fever like a little “Come Monday” on a cold northern night.  Especially when he is playing southern locals, talking (and singing) about the great weather.  If you are into bootleg recordings, I highly suggest picking up the audio to the “Live by The Bay” video from 8/17/85.  Really takes you back to Jimmy’s heyday when he was wild and the crowds were even more wild.  Also, for some other recordings to get you through the winter I suggest getting Live at the Record Plant and the Exit Inn, both from the early 70’s.  The Record Plant show is just hysterical.  You will laugh all the way through it, the banter between songs is unreal.  Jimmy sounds pretty high and drunk, as well as Jerry Jeff Walker and the rest of the “band” that night.  Come February or March, that gets a lot of playtime on my headphones passing the long end of winter in Ohio.  So, here is to hoping you get to catch some of the JB concert on Radio Margaritaville this winter with a nice cold rum drink and warm thoughts in your mind. 

P.S. Go hang around the forums at Buffettnews.com and you can get a lot of different bootlegs to fit your Buffett needs.

I Work to Live, Not Live to Work

Work, Work, Work... Where the hell is the play?

I hate Mondays.  The thought of spending 5 more days sitting at a desk for 8-10 hours a day drives me crazy.  The work world is led by people who have never seen a Caribbean sunset, dreamt of endless, lazy beach days, drank “boat drinks” before noon, or laid on a hammock for hours on end.  They have no other purpose in life but to work.  Well, I work to live, I don’t live to work.  We American’s don’t even take the month long August vacation like all of Europe does.  Or shut down for a few weeks like most of the Chinese do for New Year.  The BBC published a report a few years ago saying the US works more hours than any other industrialized country.  All this work doesn’t pay either, because of our productivity per hour is less than the Europeans.  I don’t mind working for a living, but give us some time to take a break and enjoy our living.  It is time to revolt, who has some Cuban bread and an idea for a new flag?  

The Perfect Lunch

Bahia Honda, Florida Keys

After reading a tweet from @BigKahunaBrewer being disappointed that he ended his streak of no rum or beer with lunch, it got me thinking about the perfect lunch.  We have all had fantastic food that just left us wanting more.  We have had the perfect drink to top off a good lunch.  We have all ate lunch with a spectacular view.  And we have all had a great lunch in the perfect climate.  But, to put all of those things together would be magical…  So, here is to the perfect lunch.

While in college at the University of Miami we used to frequent this little bayside shack just outside of Coconut Grove.  It was something my roommate found that was away from the hustle bustle of modern day Coconut Grove.  You sat on these old, weathered wood stools right on the edge of the bay.  They seemed to only serve fish of some sort and the only table settings were red plastic baskets and a napkin holder.  But, man did it just have that super cool vibe.  I had never been to Miami back in the heyday, but I have to imagine it was a lot like this place.  It would have surprised me to see some sailor selling “Top Secret” documents to some guy sipping vodka, it was just that kind of place.  Shady seating with shadier people.  Not quite perfect, but I loved it.

Another great place to have lunch is Kelly’s in Key West.  You sit in the “garden”, and it feels like you are sitting in a 1960’s Caribbean hideaway.  Kelly’s is home to the original building that the first tickets to fly PanAm to Cuba were sold.  The building was originally located at the Pier House but was moved later to where it sits on Whitehead Street.  They have the most magnificent Mango BBQ pork sandwich.  Was it down with a signature margarita and you are having one hell of a lunch, in the best city in the world. 

Another great lunch place is the roof top bar at Margaritaville Las Vegas.  Well, I really didn’t “eat” lunch there, I kind-of sort-of drank my lunch that day.  You  sit three stories above the strip in this little outdoor bar with a sail to hide you from the killer rays of the dessert.  I drank a few Fat Tire’s that day and even had a few margarita’s, that was one hell of a lunch. 

One of my favorite lunches (I think it was lunch, I was on island time) I have had was at a small shack at Sandals Negril.  They had this fantastic jerk chicken.  I know, you are thinking there is no way a chain resort can have such great lunch food.  But, it did.  I ate it three or four times that week.  I would stroll slowly over sometime in the afternoon.  Order some Red Stripes and jerk chicken and proceed to eat every morsel off those bones.  It has just the right about of heat, mixed with perfectly blended spices and cold beer.  That is how lunch is made to be done.  And the fact that it was on the beach, literally, made it all that much better. 

I could go on about the great lunches I have had at Fisherman’s Warf in San Fran, or the picnic lunch I had at Bahia Honda.  But, perfection to me is any place that I can get a cold drink(like the mojito at Sloppy Joe’s), in a hot climate (Whitehead St. in Key West), preferably with a water view(Coconut Grove fish shack), with some killer food (Jerk Chicken @ the beach hut at Sandals Negril).  Here is to hoping you have a bunch of almost perfect lunches to help tell your story about what your perfect lunch may be!